Resolution Run Down

Yes, I drank my 74 ounces of water today. And I also told a couple chums one of my 20101 is:

Not to make the excuses of others justify why I don't do something.

For me, to follow my dreams aka to work on the gifts He gave me. This means alot. As much as I love my chums, I did/do make their excuses justify mine. I've not utilized my time well, especially when it comes to writing, because of this action. Can't change the past, yet I can make a difference for today and tomorrow. Chums' excuses assisted my self doubts to grow. Those doubts lead me to the nearest plate of dee-lishus fried onion rings instead of sliced fresh onions to waltz on my salad topped with Roasted Red Pepper Vinegarette salad dressing. One is dee-lish-US, while the other is dee-lish-US-y good for you. It can work.

Tis my main resolution. Hang tuff with that, I got it made.

Gotta put the trash by the curb and will do my best to leave some self doubt there too!

How about you?

Psst...hang with me while I put a photo of cutie pie, Dallas Cowboy Miles Austin! This guy, along with # 24 Marion Barber, have my heart. Dallas Cowboys shut out the Philadelphia Eagles 24-0 yesterday. And I think the same outcome can happen on Saturday night as they battle in the Wildcard game. Stay tuned!

Hot August

Kinda blew the food watchin' calorie countin' thing today. And I'm OK with that.

I stopped in a fast food joint after witnessing a co-worker do a fantastic job in the play "Seven Guitars' by the late August Wilson. Since the playhouse was a near one way 30 mile trek from my house, the thought of a salad awaiting my arrival at home, wasn't doing it for me. So I splurged on a grilled chicken sandwich on whole wheat bun-lettuce and tomato. Wish I could say it really took the ravenous wildebeest urge from me.

It didn't.

I did have my once-to twice monthly munch on a fried food. This case was onion rings. At least it was a vegetable. ::) The thing is, I don't hate for myself for putting my toe in the deep in. I had it in my head, I would taste of bit of the 'good stuff' today. I did down 64 ounces of water today, plus the watermelon--which will be my dessert, does await. And I'm OK with that.

There was a time I'd hate myself aLOT for a sway off the die-it. More so because I am an emotional eater. I admit that. When I was stressed, seemed to be the time pizza, Taco Bell burrito supremes and pints (not just spoonfuls) of dee-lish Blue Bell ice cream would be devoured--in a sitting or within minutes of each other. :)

Emotional eater I was and still am-if I'm honest. Instead of the poppin' peanut M & M's and all the good stuff like that-it's now fruit that take's its place. Because oranges, watermelon, strawberries--etc are better for you and fill you up--if you're honest with yourself. OK--who wouldn't want a bag of M & M's?

Well, I do--on a day I plan to put it in that day's munch rotation. If you think about what you're gonna eat-it will taste better. You'll also appreciate the treat more. For me, I find I don't want the treat for a good long while after.

Yet like I said--you have to be HONEST with yourself.

So on that note, it's still August and it's still Hot and I want to hear alittle Neil Diamond tell us about such a night and some Brother Love...

Sunday Moments

Had a couple 'a-ha' moments over the weekend.

First was the untimely passing of my favorite author, E. Lynn Harris at age 54. In 1991, he self published his first novel, while he lived and worked here in Dallas. The rest is history. When even E Lynn would make a book signing stop in Dallas--I was there. He's joked at one signing how he hated the fact he couldn't buy Orange Crush soda in where lived--it may have been Atlanta or New York--I can't remember which. Nonetheless, I found a six bottle carton of Orange Crush and took it to E Lynn's signing the next day. He may not have known my name, but he knew I was the Orange Crush Girl.

Last saw E Lynn was Summer 2008. Informed E Lynn his writing style was the most I wanted to emulate--because it made me turn the pages. After E Lynn thanked me, he asked, "So is your own writing doing?" He stared right though me--no excuse was good enough. There still isn't a good enough excuse. How IS my writing? A-ha moment indeed.

When you speak with someone once loved with all your heart. Spoke marriage once upon a time. Today was the first time we spoke--through our mouths and not text messages. Like receiving a root canal without numbing of the gums. It proved that season is so long gone. Yet another season could always sprout--just takes two to plant and water the seed. A-ha moment indeed.

And weight loss. I'd blogged I'd lost 70 pounds and kept it off for quite while. Then house hunt/purchase and job topsy turvy-ness happened first quarter of 2008 and became my excuse for alot of Tombstone pizzas. I tried to psyche myself out by not putting all my weight on the scale. But I knew. Two months ago, I finally joined the senior rec center in town and got back to how I was fed in the hospital, before and after my open heart surgery. Given alot of food, but lost weight. Fruits and veggies at every meal. Sometimes a couple helpings of both--different items tho. So I knew I ate alot, yet what I ate was good for me--and finally, FINALLY my scale some change. Still a ways to go--however I can tell a difference when I look in the mirror. The exercise helped. No more snacking M & M's when I'm bored. Just a few spoonfuls of Blue Bell ice cream instead of the whole pint--at one sitting. Now I have better nights' sleep, not so much bone creaking--feel better all around. Next month, I'll sign up for aerobics at the center. Is a handful of strawberries as much fun as a handful of onion rings? Of course not--but if you plan just right--you can have both! That's an 'a-ha' moment in itself!

So on this Sunday--gotta do a few more resume send outs, so I can veg the rest of the night.

He didn't bring me this far to leave me. I am blessed.

It is...

Finally Friday!

Got out of work early (a BIG thumbs up on that!) We all had to skip lunch to be able to leave early. So needless to say I was starved when I exited. Wound up doing lunch with a chum, who just moved back to Dallas. Upon return to Dallas, she actually worked at the same place I did.

After 10 days my chum quit.

It was the right decision. Anyway, we chatted for about 3 hours. Long overdue. And alot of fun. When I left work, I'd pondered going to a movie--but heck, you can always do that. So to lunch I went. Made me realize I'd missed our get togethers, plus time has flown. Her daughter just turned 20.

* sigh*

So, on this Friday after the yummy burger I munched and dee-lish onions--which I gotta admit weren't at the best burger place in Dallas: Burger Island-and quite tasty on the tummy--gotta go tread and bike.

The scale didn't scream as much this morning. I can tell some inches have slid on off. Gotta like that.

If you will excuse me, gotta get the tennyrunners on and go do my thing.

Fast Food Splurge...

I don't head to fast food joints so much anymore--however after an after work errand today, why not stop at Sonic? Love their commercials! Plus I'll munch on their onion rings a time or two.

So when my car hop brought my grub, I became a ravenous cougar ready to shred her prey. For grins and for something other than my usual unsweetened iced tea with two packets of sweeteners, I ordered a strawberry limeade. Thought it would whet my whistle.

It didn't.

OK, should I have used the two packets of sweetener I woulda used in my iced tea for the strawberry limeade? Just to make it a little sweet to go with its tart? Guess that shows I rarely-like never- get limeades. Just sounded like something I would enjoy. COULD enjoy. And I debated between the limeade and the strawberry slush.

Shoulda got the strawberry slush. Well, until somebody schools me on how to savor a limeade.

Next time.

Burgers and Buds...

I met my chum , Movie Man, for a tasty burger with even more delicious onion rings, last night. We hadn't been able to chat, face to face of late--so we were long over due. Movie Man, is just that--a Movie Man--he can tell you anything and everything about movies in the last 30 or so years--box office, director, producer, behind the scene stuff. He can tell you every movie we've seen together, plus the theatre and if the sun was up or not that day. Yea, sometimes I think he visits the Land of Oz more than he should, yet he's one of my bestest, goodest chums.

So we sat there last night. He listened to me ramble on. Movie Man will keep mental tabs of everything I say. I gabbed on about the 50th birthday bash from last week, threw out several names-he remembered them all. He's good like that. He gets kinda ticked when I don't remember as much. "Mad Cow" I say. I told him about my one classmate suggesting--urging me on to go into public speaking.

Movie Man agreed. He checked off a list of topics I could speak of. He even mentioned to speak about being the only black kid in my class of 150--how many people know about that? What did I encounter? Born with microtia. The writing. Losing my mother when I was 13. Movie Man was great---so supportive. Encouragment. Just like my classmate.

Only one major difference. A little eighteen year difference. Movie Man was born in August 1976. Three months after I graduated from high school.

We have our differences. Certainly. There are times I want to hit fast forward, so he'll grow up faster. Then I'm sure he wants me to re-wind so I can remember what it was like. Movie Man keeps me on my toes, even at times I want to kick him with them. He gives me insight of things, at a different point of view--a different generational point of view.

We went to Barack Obama's rally here in Dallas a few months back. Our discussion after was fruitful. Just as it was last night. It astounds me, how conversation with someone who was five years old when the first Indiana Jones movie came out and I was just thinking "Wow, Harrison Ford is hot and I wonder how much beer I can drink tonight?" can be so good.

Movie Man is more of man than he gives himself credit for. After all, after my surgery in 2006, he made sure I celebrated my birthday. I couldn't drive yet, so he picked me up, took me to lunch and made sure I enjoyed the day. We actually sat in a grocery store parking lot, while I gave myself my daily IV. He sipped a Mountain Dew. It couldn't have been fun, for him, to see a friend of his, impatient to regain her strength. Yet he made it through. We both did.

Now it's 2008. We chat. We laugh. We tick each other off. I still don't remember as much as he'd like. Movie Man still remembers everything. I asked him last night if he's up for some racquetball, since he injured his calf a couple months ago.

The kid says, 'Oh sure. I won't have to run around that much to beat YOU."

Yep, one of my goodest, and bestest chums.

Game ON!

Mother's Day...

My mom died when I was 13. So long ago. We missed growing up together. I regret that. My mom died of complications from an elective surgery. In raw terms, she died from complications from weight loss surgery. Now this was 1971--things were not as they were now. Our family doctor was not for it. Yet, my mom saw the success of her younger sister, plus my 17 year cousin--and wanted to have it done. Mom was like a lot of us women--yo yo'd all her life. My dad didn't want her to have it. Something told me, I didn't want her to have it. Yet, she had her own mind (That's where I get it from) and wentwith the doctor her sister and niece had.

Mom had this surgery in June 1971. On September 27, 1971 she died. Yellow liver aptrophy.

She left a husband and teenage daughter.

For years, I blamed myself. If I would have said something. Yet, she was so happy 'to be thin'.....I was so guilted. Every year, my dad told me, "She was going to do it anyway, honey. Her mind was made up." He knew her death ate at me. So for those years, I hated Mother's Day. I didnt' even want to show my face to anything or anybody on that day. I didn't deserve to be happy.

I eventually did have a step-mother, yet she was not my mom. My dad loved her, and he was happy--that's what mattered.

My strength from God caused me to grow up and move on. Wasn't easy. And it began about decades after my mom died. So it wasn't so quick either--yet was I ready to even listed to God? When he really began to knock on the door? Nope. I turned a deaf ear.

I wonder how my life would've been with her Earthly impact. We would have fought along the way, yet those fights would be laced with love. I have my dreams. My memories. The guilt I felt is gone. The love she had for me is there.

Mother's Day is day I can smile. Sure, I remember her spankings--:) Yet, I remember her introduction for me to A & W onion rings. Mom asked, 'You like onions, right?" So I bit into one--LOVE. Things like that. Words of encouragment. The fact she said I was her 'angel'--I wonder how would have been. Yet, the life had was good.

Happy Mother's Day!

FLOORS & Customer Service....

OK--so I call the store where I THOUGHT my flooring would come from. Once I talked to this guy, to make sure it was in in stock---uh....I don't think so. The guy, I had been working with, was off--no prob, I thought--wrong. I was told the floor wasn't in stock, and I could go pick it up at the warehouse---45 mins away--or I could pay, them 30, 40 or gee, $50 (as another guy in the back ground said, "Just put $50 on it.) Then put me on hold twice. He wanted my card number right then. Told him, I'd wait and talk the guy I'd worked with, "Oh, ma'am, your order is secure." I don't think so. I came home and looked at the other flooring site--the same place that showed me how to install the stuff. Hey, they're having a sale...I'm headed there tonight to pick up my flooring.

Being a DIY--is a whole 'nother world. No wonder, I'm longing for some onion rings.