October 18, 2001 was Thursday

....and the day a man who loved me more than life went Home. My sweet Big Daddy Don battled diabetes like the warrior he was, yet the filthy disease wound up with the victory of the war...

I know Dad would get such a kick from this terra cotta pot thing I am doing. I can see him now-With his King Edward cigar secured in his mouth, Dad would inspect the pot. Cigar smoke circling the pot. Then he'd do his nod and "hmm-mm" of approval. He'd ask me about them and say the pots were pretty. Of course, Dad would then sit the pot on the end table by his chair. We'd get to watching some TV, probably Andy Griffith Show and Dad would need to flick off the ashes from this cigar...into guess what? Yep. My pot! I'd yell, "Dad!" He'd get his eyes all big, and shrugged his gentle giant shoulders and go, "Well, ain't it a ashtray?" We would both laugh. I laugh even now just with the thought of it.

Ten years today. A decade. Where has the time gone? I miss my dad. Sometimes I swear I can smell that cigar smoke in this house. I know my sweet daddy's spirit lifts me up ti this day.

...and I wouldn't want it any other way. I am blessed.

Father's Day 2011

This is my 10th Father's Day without my Daddy. Doesn't seem like it's been a decade since I became an adult orphan. I would hear his voice on the phone, every weekend "Just wonderin' what yer up to" he'd say. Dad usually called on Saturday morns, about 10ish or so. I wouldn't leave my apartment until we spoke.

The last few months of his life, Dad wasn't able to call me, so I called him. Those were bittersweet times. I knew life would soon change as we both knew it. I'm still in a 'change' mode--these years later. Dad would get a kick out of that and just chew on that King Edward Cigar.

In fact, if I showed Dad one of these terra cotta pots I'm trying to perfect, he'd size it up, just kinda nod, then use it as an ashtray for those ashes of said King Edward Cigar. Then he'd tell me to just keep on tryin, 'cause I would get one of these times.

Dad liked to fish, loved his westerns, devoured pineapple malts, put hot sauce on his chit'lins, send me at least a dozen birthday cards, ask me if I caught any Andy Griffith episodes, boast about the Iowa Hawkeyes, sip on scotch and milk when he shouldn't be, pet my cats and they would play with the smoke rings from said King Edward cigar, fry me up pork chops whenever I went back to Iowa and we'd sit at our kitchen table and just talk. Those were the BEST times

Just Dad and me.
What I choose to remember
And blessed my Daddy's spirit dances with me still
Sometime I think I can smell that cigar smoke...

Just Cuz I Can

Thinking of TV past--especially those scenes that still make smile even after all this time!

Yep, yep anything with Barney Fife back in Mayberry
Beaver Cleaver like when he got stuck in that cup on the billboard--
Or anything the Evans Family on Good Times, before Daddy James died-
Lionel Jefferson's scene with Sammy Davis Jr on "All in the Family"--
And this one when Florence realizes Billy Dee Williams is her living room...ahhh..

June 21, 2009 is Father's Day

Big Daddy Don (as a chum called him) has been gone since October 2001. Still so miss the ever King Edward cigar smokin' let's go fishin and then stop and get some ice cream guy! :) I had a habit of sending Dad a good dozen cards on Father's Day-. How that started, I really don't know. Just what I did. And I miss doing that too.

Could go on and on and ON about memories-good and bad-however, I won't. Not right now.

I do picture being back in our house in Iowa with my belly filled with Dad's dee-lish bar-b-q. Dad would situated in his chair, while I sat across from him. The cats (I hauled 750 miles from Dallas) and Dad's hound called a truce and snooze somewhere. With King Edward cigar in his mouth, and ashes sprinkle on his shirt, Dad clicks through channels on the remote.

And then Dad finds the channel that takes us to where we both like to go: Mayberry

Memory--indeed.

I am blessed.

History Past

A relationship and Richard Nixon. What do they have in common? Both have passed. One I want to know about. The other...not to so much.

First Richard Nixon. I was in high school when he resigned. On that August day, I watched President Nixon announce his resignation and to leave office the following afternoon. I knew it was history, yet I had too many other things to do. When Richard Nixon and David Frost conducted their infamous interviews in 1977, I didn't watch. Once again, just too much else too do. Well, today, I saw Frost/Nixon, Opie Taylor--er--Ron's Howard's newest Oscar worthy work. When I watch those old Andy Griffith, especially, that first season, I marvel what Little Ronny grew up to be. Anyway, Frost/Nixon had me asking myself, "Is this what happened?" All I remember of David Frost was dating Diahann Carroll and I wondered what she saw in him. Not so handsome in my eye. This movie piqued my interest in a piece of history long past. I'd like to see these interviews myself--just to see. Just to know.
And Frank Langella--heck, I can see what Whoopi Goldberg saw in him! :)

The second thing; A relationship. Ahh. Not much to say there. I mentioned the guy in a previous entry. He's since said I crossed the line and disrespected him. How? By talking about him to his pastor for a few minutes. The conversation totalled five minutes--if that--during two separate occasions. I looked for some guidance from someone that knew the guy and somebody we both respected. To a degree, I do see the guy's point--being angry. Especially if he felt I went behind his back. If anything I am sorry he's upset, yet I still have no regrets I spoke to his pastor. I'd tired of words being said and no actions being done-that's if there was conversation at all. Oh well. I look at the fact, I didn't blow my gasket to this guy, or cry in the comfort of my room or even anything really. His choice. Gee, to quote a movie, maybe he's just not into me. Big deal There are so many other things I need to do.

History Past.