May 4, 1990 was Friday

I got laid off.

Nope--not on this day in 2009, but back then. The company that brought myself and a few other co-workers to Dallas from Iowa, announced at 9am we were history at 4pm. We saw it coming, yet in denial. Greyhound Bus Lines' drivers were on strike. Without any drivers, or even replacement drivers, there wasn't enough work for us. I was a Charter Bus Travel Rep. I enjoyed that job--when it was in Iowa. When we moved to Dallas, I dunno--something just was different. Worked with a fine group of folks, yet something was missing. Bigger City, Brighter Lights. Not sure.

With the layoff, came a decision: leave or stay? The co-workers I cared the most about didn't hesitate. Back to Iowa before the U-Haul was even packed. Me, I wasn't so sure. I'd lived in Kansas City twice, plus lived in Des Moines (which was 35 miles away from my hometown). I couldn't stand the fact of moving back home---again. Honestly, I think I worried too much what folks would thing, when actually I shoulda cared less.

I was so in love with a man then (when wasn't I?) Problem was, he wasn't in love with me as much--like not at all, but that came into play later on...which of course is another post. Yet, I didn't care. Maybe for him, I decided to move here, even tho he didn't realize that. Greyhound wanted to send me to Atlanta to work in a 2 person office. I would have been the other person in that 2 person office. I thought about it --hard. Even met the other person, who's job was to wine and dine me so I'd consider the Atlanta move.

Part of me wanted Atlanta. For once I'd be part of the majority, instead of always being the minority, as was in my hometown-where I was one of the two black students in my entire high school. But, I didn't like the thought of moving somewhere -again-where I didn't know anybody ala Kansas City. That's another reason, outside of the man I loved, but who didn't love me, I chose Dallas. I would be moving with folks I knew.

So while others caravaned back to Iowa, I pitched my tent and stayed in Dallas.

19 years ago. Any regrets? More like what if's. If I'd moved back to Iowa, just one more time? If I'd gone to Atlanta, in 1988, instead of Dallas? How would my life be different? Because I was so nuts about this guy back then, I didn't give any other guy a chance. If I had, maybe I'd be married, kids, more cats, a dog, a Cadillac Escalade...OK, getting a little materialistic, yet you get my point.

Hmm.

Just hafta remember, He didn't bring me this far to leave me.