Thursday, July 8, 2010

Like Before

Horses, a dog, corn fields and my orange car. Iowa. Screams IOWA, huh? You may need to click on it, to biggify it. Well, maybe all except the orange car aka my Pumpkin. This was snapped at a chum's house. They have 5 acres of mowable yard, the rest somebody farms on. They live on a gravel road. I'd forgotten how tricky gravel can be--if you go a bit too fast--trust me.

Iowa. This is the first visit, since my dad's passing in 2001, that the visit home felt different. It felt good. See, even tho Iowa was my home, I had no home to go to. My dad wasn't there to great me with his infamous King Edward cigar in his mouth. Would be an emotional roller coaster, the few times I did go back to Iowa. A classmate, who lives in Iowa, still says it's sometimes hard for her to come to our hometown, because her parents are gone too. I thought I was alone--yet more and more adult children, more so those who have moved away, experience this. I still have friends and other family---however it just wasn't the same.

This trip tho--I didn't feel all the emotion. Sure, I cried when I headed out to the cemetery to see my parents' graves. I told them I still wanted to make them so proud. Outside of that--I felt closure. All was OK.

In fact, I had the BEST time in Iowa, I'd had in a long, long time. I was asked if I would ever move back. I don't know. Being there, did feel right. Maybe because all the classmates, back for the reunion, knew me 'before'. Knew me from the first. And I liked that.

Lots to ponder as I drove south on I-35 and smiled when I finally saw this sign:

Would I move back? No clue.
I do know, I have lunch tomorrow with a classmate who's lived in Dallas, maybe just a bit longer than I have. We hadn't seen each other in a few years until this past weekend. Sadly he's now a widower. Our Saturday night chat was filled with sweetness, fun, and laughs.
Just like I remember.

Just like before.

1 comment:

Old Kitty said...

Awwww this is so lovely!! I really think you have two homes now- Iowa and Texas - all filled and yet to be filled with memories!

I've really enjoyed your round trip to here - I love your orange car! I hope you return time and time again and I hope each one will be as poignant but happy too!

Take care
x