Just a smidge of an update. Yesterday, I wrote about how Bear's, my ex, Facebook page said he was married. Then by the time I came home last night Bear's page was gone. There's also been no response to my text. of congrats. I am still kinda sorta surprise I've heard nothing, yet I'm kinda sorta not. I just hope Bear's happy.
Ya know, in recent times, two relationships meant alot to me. Bear and Movie Man, another I'd posted about. They were/are two totally different men yet more alike than I realized. If there was way to merge em together, I'd have the most perfect man--well, except Bear hated cats and Movie Man liked them, but was allergic. So the 'perfect man' would need to like cats and take allergy pills or shots--
These two knew of each other. Bear and Movie Man even met. We all laughed and it was a fun moment in time. We even tried to start our own writers' group--which just lasted one time. I still have the papers they wrote that one and only time. They may have been jealous of each other in a dizzy kind of way. Bear and Movie Man both knew what one man gave me, the other man wouldn't or couldn't.
The main thing is I loved them both. And now both are out of my life. For awhile, actually. When enough was enough of me being mad at myself (not them) for my actions, I realized it was time to close the chapter. If we should ever cross paths again, we'd have our past and it's OK to visit--I just can't stay there. We would basically start all over to know each other now. And realize it all can't be like before. I would get made at myself all over again...
My smidge became more of a smudge.
Blue Bell Peaches and Homemade Vanilla Ice Cream makes a smidge, smudge smile-
So 'cuse me, my bowl awaits to runneth over!